Dedeker Winston

Writer | Podcaster | Relationship Coach

Location icon United States of America

Dedeker Winston was raised to be a wholesome Christian conservative but later opted to be a sex-positive polyamory activist, writer, and relationship coach. She currently provides one-on-one coaching services for people transitioning into non-monogamy and is one of the hosts of the Multiamory podcast.

She has been sought out as an expert on alternative relationships for Cosmopolitan, Glamour, Newsweek, Vice, Bustle, and also appeared on the FOX television show Utopia. Her book, The Smart Girl’s Guide to Polyamory: Everything You Need to Know About Open Relationships, Non-Monogamy, and Alternative Love (Skyhorse Publishing), debuted in February 2017. When she isn't coaching, writing, modeling, or spending time with her multiple partners, she enjoys backpacking around the globe, playing video games, and obsessively applying chapstick.

Portfolio
Bustle
03/29/2017
Signs Your Non-Monogamous Relationship May Be Secretly Unhealthy

Some people assume that it's more "enlightened" to be in a non-monogamous or polyamorous relationship. It's true that in order for a non-monogamous relationship to be effective and happy, it does require a number of more enlightened habits, such as h

Multiamory
12/05/2016
If the Buddha was on Tinder: 3 Ways to Stay Zen on First Dates

A first date can boost your ego, energize you, and be the start of a life-changing connection. Or, a first date can turn out to be a depressing, discouraging, totally awkward waste of your time. Between those two extremes, it's easy to trampoline between excited butterflies and anxiety-ridde

Non-Monogamy Blog by SwingTowns
06/02/2017
Adding a Third to Your Relationship | Non-Monogamy Blog by SwingTowns

Yes, I said it. Don't add a third to your relationship. "But you've been in triad relationships before!" you may cry. You certainly know a lot about my personal life, and yes, I've been in a number of triads, both MFM and FFM. It wasn't easy, but I loved it every time.

Bustle
12/12/2016
Common Judgements Non-Monogamous People Hear - And How To Respond

Opinions. Everyone has them, and they will throw them at you whether you ask for it or not. As the holidays are fast approaching, you may be gearing up to come out to your family about your non-monogamy. Or, the word may have already gotten out, and

Bustle
12/01/2016
5 Tips For Coming Out To Your Family As Non-Monogamous

If you're in the closet about being in a non-monogamous relationship (or several), you may be seeing a double whammy on the horizon: obligatory family holidays mixed with a conservative, sex-negative, and often close-minded political climate.

Bustle
11/02/2016
The First Mistakes You'll Probably Make If You Open Up Your Relationship

If you search the Internet, you'll find countless articles on the ways in which millennials are creating a "new" monogamy that is characterized by, ironically, injecting non-monogamy into otherwise traditional-looking relationships and marriages. Recent studies show that as many as 1 in 5 Americans have engaged in a consensually non-monogamous relationship at some point, running the range from "monogamish" to non-hierarchal polyamory to full-blown relationship anarchy.

Multiamory
10/05/2015
Pushy Men, Kinky Couples, and Horny Crackpots: Online Dating in Istanbul

I've been in Istanbul for 10 days now, and what a place it is! My first few days were spent reeling from culture shock...departing from the easy, laid-back pace of Greece and crash-landing into the frantic, overwhelming stimulation of the largest city in Turkey. My neighborhood, Beyoğlu,

Multiamory
04/10/2017
The 3 Things You Must Talk about Before Opening Your Relationship

You might be here on the Multiamory website for any number of reasons. You might be in a monogamous relationship right now and thinking about opening up, or you might be single and considering entering into a relationship that will be non-monogamous, or you may have been in several non-monogam

Multiamory
11/03/2015
Stop Letting These 3 Things Ruin Your Relationships

I've ruined a number of relationships in my day. I've also had the great pleasure of creating a number of well-functioning, healthy, high quality relationships. I've gone through phases of hopelessly lamenting to my friends, "I'm just no good at this interpersonal connection bullshit." And

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