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David E. Guimond

Storyteller-at-Large

Location icon Canada

Creative. Academic. Branded. Government. Blog. Non-Fiction. Viral.

CONTENT. NOVELS. ESSAYS. POSTS. THESES. REPORTS. VIDEOS.

Portfolio
Novel in Progress
Bullface (or, Helen and the Heat Death of the Universe) (excerpt)

Raised in the hinterlands of a harsh and broken land, he would become as merciless as his surroundings: as devoid of life as the Kilchevov sulfur plains to the West, as crushing as the rockslides of Mount Vanya to the North, as persistent as the oil-tinged waves of the Yevdastik Sea to the East, and as punishing as the noonday sun – a hole punched through to hell – that scorched across the Desert of the Damned to the South.

Screenplay
And Now You Are Cursed From The Earth (excerpt)

FADE IN: EXT. ONE-LANE HIGHWAY - DUSK Appalachia winter, more mud grey slush than white powder. Tucked into a thin patch of sick trees, a roadside diner squats by the side of a forgotten road, lights bright in the greyblue dusk. Busted pickups dot the parking lot. One more pulls in.

Copy
North of Rosemont | Made in Montreal

The notebook your ideas deserve. Tough yet elegant. Field tested for durability with premium, fine-controlled paper. Make full use of your best tools.

Content
Your Astrological Sign Is the Last Thing You Should Be Worried About

Like a glassy-eyed spirit from beyond the grave moaning about charts and stars, astrology’s popularity is on the rise — again!!! — emerging from what should have been it’s airtight tomb – science, maturity, intelligence – and that doesn’t bode well for me, you or the future of the human species.

Content
San Pellegrino | Itineraries of Taste | Montreal

Planted at the crossroads of North American and European history, rooted in the long legacy of the region’s indigenous cultures and enriched by centuries of immigration from around the world, Montreal has a cultural vitality that blossoms in many directions.

Reports
Doomsday Religious Movements

This paper uses open sources to examine any topic with the potential to cause threats to public safety or national security.

Essays
Writing This Life

As a bratty, rambunctious kid, I lucked out growing up next to the public library, Mrs. Gamble the librarian always ever-patient with my endless barrage of questions. I lucked out with Mrs. Berbedes, my high school English teacher, who inspired both creativity and a love for the written word.

Content
Punk Indie Rawk Drone

Valleys stand on a deserted midnight beach forging delicately serrated melodies for the coming storm.

Content
eLOVE Television

After carefully reading volumes of impeccable dating advice from the Renaissance Man, skillfully adapting it to your own particular dating lifestyle, and essentially conniving someone into going out with your sorry self, you now have a full-time, no-holds-barred, non-blow-up, non-digital-image, serious girlfriend.

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