Katie Parker

New Zealand

Freelance writer and post-graduate student journalist at AUT with an MA in Film, Television and Media Studies

[email protected]

Portfolio

Features

The Wireless
Love is dead: An emotional guide to the Brangelina bombshell

Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie were the greatest Hollywood power couple of their generation. And now they're over. When you woke up this morning you probably thought all was right with the world: sure it's been pretty drizzly, the housing crisis continues afoot and the the racist housewives are still on the loose.

The Spinoff
09/07/2016
Let me be your ruler: The impatient ambition of Chloe Swarbrick

She's bright, she's bold, she's running for mayor. And yes, she's 22. Katie Parker talks to Chloe Swarbrick about age, experience, and why she wants to be the big kahuna. Chloe Swarbrick, in person, is professional, earnest and engaging. She talks quickly and persuasively, holds your gaze confide

The Wireless
A sight for sore eyes: why watching the Olympics is a win for women

The Olympics are a radical season of sport watching, which gives our rugby-obsessed little country other things to think about for a change, writes Katie Parker. Clearly things are not looking great for the Rio Olympics: the Zika virus, super gross pollution, kidnappings and a corrupt government are rarely conducive to a fun mass international sporting event.

The Wireless
God forbid

Do religious young people watch less porn? The effect porn has on young people's brains is constantly ew under review, but young people don't care - they're too busy watching porn. Nothing can stop them! Except maybe God?

The Wireless
A NZ International Film Festival trailer breakdown

Confused about the film festival? Don't want to take a wild stab in the dark? Allow us to ease your fears and arm you for the season ahead. The NZ International Film Festival season is upon us and yet again we are faced with a programme full to the brim of films everyone pretends to have heard of.

The Wireless
What your sext is really saying

You know when that hotline bling, that can only mean one thing. You are drifting off to sleep on a peaceful Tuesday night when hear your phone buzz. It's that guy. You see it is a picture. You open the picture. The lighting is unflattering. The composition is awful.

The Spinoff
04/20/2016
C:/DOS/RUN: The Forgotten Golden Age of MS-DOS Gaming

The era of MS-DOS games may have been a bizarro haze of hit and miss, but for the burgeoning millennial they were the last vestige of PC innocence. 35 years since their debut, Katie Parker reminisces.

The Spinoff
04/14/2016
Throwback Thursday: Being Eve and the fantasy of the Y2K New Zealand teen

Katie Parker reopens the locker of her adolescence in Being Eve, the local teen series brimming with asymmetrical tank tops, IRL dating and fourth wall-breaking. Like all naive pre-teens, at the age of 10 all I wanted in the world was to hit adolescence. Whether I was trimming my non-existent

The Wireless
Choosing sides

Why do we always demonise the dump-er, never the dump-ee? This feature is part of our two-week series on choices. Click here for more. The decision to breakup may not feel like a decision at all.

Reviews

The Wireless
The Singles Life: The sweet relief of Kimbra's comeback

Welcome to weekly series The Singles Life, where known experts Katie Parker and Hussein Moses peruse, ponder and pontificate on the latest and (maybe) greatest in New Zealand music. Kimbra is back and better than ever. But did she wait too long? Katie Parker and Hussein Moses have been watching the clock.

The Wireless
The Singles Life: Silver Scrolls emergency edition

Welcome to weekly series The Singles Life, where known experts Katie Parker and Hussein Moses peruse, ponder and pontificate on the latest and (maybe) greatest in New Zealand music. This year's APRA Silver Scrolls are going down tonight, with Street Chant, Tami Neilson, Thomas Oliver, Lydia Cole and The Phoenix Foundation making up the top five finalists for the main award.

The Wireless
The Singles Life: Is this the NZ music video of the year?

Welcome to weekly series The Singles Life, where known experts Katie Parker and Hussein Moses peruse, ponder and pontificate on the latest and (maybe) greatest in New Zealand music. Callum Rei McDougall, better known simply as Rei, may be that most feared and sinister thing - a Wellington rapper - but we mustn't hold that against him.

The Wireless
The First Monday In May: high fashion through the looking glass

The First Monday In May sees cultural tensions swept under the rug in exchange for the kind of red carpet porn you can only dream of, writes Katie Parker. In this age of the beautiful Instagram, so-so Snapchat and shameful, shameful Vine, celebrity access is at an all-time high, and yet certain events, certain moments, still elude us.

The Wireless
The Singles Life: In Stan We Trust

Welcome to weekly series The Singles Life, where known experts Katie Parker and Hussein Moses peruse, ponder and pontificate on the latest and (maybe) greatest in New Zealand music. The New Zealand top 40 singles chart can be a pretty dire place for local music, but Stan Walker's latest summer jam might be just what we need to turn things around.

The Wireless
Did we really need another Blair Witch film?

Blair Witch might suffer from the inevitable comparison to its predecessor, but in the year of the reboot, it isn't dead in the water. When The Blair Witch Project came out in 1999, it was the movie everyone talked about.

The Wireless
The Singles Life: Bow down to Parris Goebel

Welcome to weekly series The Singles Life, where known experts Katie Parker and Hussein Moses peruse, ponder and pontificate on the latest and (maybe) greatest in New Zealand music. Everyone knows Parris Goebel for being our very own superstar choreographer expat extraordinaire, but did you know she's got a burgeoning music career in the works?

The Wireless
The Singles Life: Who the hell is Graham Candy?

Welcome to weekly series The Singles Life, where known experts Katie Parker and Hussein Moses peruse, ponder and pontificate on the latest and (maybe) greatest in New Zealand music. If his record label is to be believed, pop singer Graham Candy is about to become New Zealand's next big export.

The Wireless
Bad Moms: Another half-assed female-driven comedy

Comedies for and about women should be a wonderful thing, but as Katie Parker finds, these mums aren't bad, just mediocre. Female-driven comedy has a bad, checkered history, mostly in the sense that there often isn't any.

The Wireless
The Singles Life: Video killed the reality TV star

Welcome to weekly series The Singles Life, where known experts Katie Parker and Hussein Moses peruse, ponder and pontificate on the latest and (maybe) greatest in New Zealand music. Remember Naz from The Bachelor NZ? Of course you do. Somehow she ended up in a music video by a reggae artist who goes by the name of K Dread.

The Wireless
War Dogs isn't the movie you've been sold

War Dogs pitches for Goodfellas-style drama as often as it does stoner comedy. The marketing for War Dogs is deceptive. The poster pays homage to Scarface; the coupling of Jonah Hill and Miles Teller suggest a bromance; and the trailer makes it look like Pineapple Express. But it's not really any of these things.

The Wireless
We need to talk about how bad Suicide Squad is

Yes, it's as hideously incoherent as you've heard. Remember when Taylor Swift put out ? For months maybe, years it seemed, she released poster after poster of her squad, introducing their super girl personas. "Lena Dunham is 'Lucky Fiori'"; "Cindy Crawford is 'headmistress'"; "Ellie Goulding is 'Destructa X'" etc etc.

The Wireless
Paterson and the fine line between innocence and naivety

White guy character studies are dime a dozen, but NZIFF entry Paterson manages to avoid a bevy of the classic pitfalls. A week ago, were you to tell me I'd love a movie about a white male poet bus driver who refuses to get a smartphone, I would have been very stern with you.

The Wireless
Personal Shopper doesn't deserve your applause

NZIFF's Personal Shopper has all the hallmarks of a terrible film, writes Katie Parker Sometimes you go to see a movie and you think it's going to be about something cool - for instance, ghosts and rich people - and then it turns out it's all about something else altogether - say, closure and self-discovery and coming to terms with things - and you don't quite know what to think.

The Wireless
In my father's (Australian) den

Antipodean angst and melancholy melodrama rule in the NZ International Film Festival's Aussie drama The Daughter. The melodrama is a staple of antipodean cinema. Every few years another tale of family, secrets, the past and adolescence surfaces to show the melancholy and mayhem of our little corner of the world: Crush; Jindabyne; Rain; Lantana...

The Wireless
Monsters, actually

The NZ International Film Festival gets bleak and brutal with Green Room's realist take on the monster genre. Monsters aren't scary. People are scary. It's a line of thinking adopted by much modern horror, and in particular prestige horror. And it's so hot right now.

Metro Magazine
04/27/2016
Rhysently Granted - review * Metro Magazine

It's been 20 years since Rhys Darby and Grant Lobban formed sketch comedy/music duo Rhysently Granted and, as we are told from the outset they struggled to find their audience in early-90s Christchurch. Were they ahead of their time? Darby and Lobban are back together to find out.

Metro Magazine
04/24/2016
Frickin Dangerous Bro: G.O.A.T - review * Metro Magazine

What does it take to become the Greatest Of All Time? With G.O.A.T, young comedy up-and-comers Frickin Dangerous Bro - comprised of Jamaine Ross, James Roque & Pax Assadi - endeavor to find out. Peering at their set list just off-stage, and often beginning a sketch with "Shall we just launch into the next one?"

The Wireless
Review: The Hateful Eight

It might not be his best, but Quentin Tarantino's The Hateful Eight feels like his darkest release so far. At the Auckland premiere of Quentin Tarantino's The Hateful Eight, it was abundantly clear that this kind of thing doesn't happen very often. For one thing, who bothers to hold premieres here?

The Wireless
Review: Death Cab For Cutie at St James Theatre

Death Cab For Cutie deliver an unexpectedly fun and fast-paced Auckland show. Are Death Cab for Cutie a nostalgia act? It was this question that puzzled me as I arrived at last night's concert at the St James Theatre, the band's first ever Auckland show and a leisurely three days since their performance in Wellington on Saturday.

The Wireless
Review: Tickled

Tickled finds humour in the absurd, but its subjects truly shine once David Farrier steps aside. Tickled opens with Hilary Barry's disembodied voice declaring David Farrier "everyone's favourite pop culture journalist", a clip no doubt extracted from his days at TV3.

The Wireless
The X Factor NZ: Enter the void

If developing these contestants into marketable singers is the aim, why do they seem so anonymous? The theme of this week's X Factor performance show was the bleakly ironic 'One Hit Wonders' and in an act of total sadism our dear sweet X Factees were asked to peer into their futures: "Who are they, exactly?"

The Wireless
Film review: Spectre

In Spectre, James Bond has an origin story fit for a marvel superhero. Unfortunately, it ends up feeling tacked on, unnecessary and cynical. There's a moment in Spectre when, having narrowly scrambled free from a particularly explosive penultimate showdown, Daniel Craig turns to Bond girl Lea Seydoux and announces briskly "It's not over yet".

The Wireless
Film review: The Martian

How much you enjoy The Martian will depend heavily on just how charming you find Matt Damon. Ridley Scott, on the back of a slew of disappointments, is rolling the dice once again with the release of space epic The Martian.

The Wireless
The X Factor NZ 2015: Top 10 moments

After a long tedious period of gestation a star is finally born, and last night we welcomed Beau into the world as X Factor NZ victor and proud new car owner. Taking out smug Shore boys Brendon Thomas and the Vibes and sweet, lovely Nyssa, Beau's inconsistencies paled in comparison to his much-celebrated "uniqueness" and I guess that means he's as deserving as anyone.

The Wireless
The X Factor NZ: The end begins

This week we arrived at the X Factor NZ semi-finals, "the toughest of all the rounds," according to Dominic Bowden. With the loss of Stevie "Hatbeard" Tonks, our burgeoning baby stars are now whittled down to three and we have but a week left to find out just who wins that car.

The Wireless
The X Factor NZ: Hold back the tears

Why does The X Factor NZ seem infinitely more interested in what's going on with the judges? This week our dear X Factees performed New Zealand hits from the past 25 years, and while one might think "ah because it is May which is New Zealand Music month" one would be mistaken as that was never mentioned, and instead this week The X Factor celebrated 25 years of NZ On Air.

The Wireless
The X Factor NZ: Back to black

This week was yet another reminder that beneath a thin veneer of order, chaos still reigns at X Factor NZ. With the announcement this week that Dominic Bowden is to be hosting Dancing with the Stars, it seems timely to query, what the hell is the deal with this guy?

The Wireless
The X Factor NZ: Bad Blood

A double elimination brings a harrowing ordeal of shock and dread. Presumably in an effort to spice things up and trim the fat, this week we awaited the first double elimination of the X Factor season.

The Wireless
The X Factor NZ: That summer feeling

Improvements have been made, true contenders are emerging and Dominic Bowden only grows in power. Coming in the wake of the sad cricket game and following a lot of very public turmoil on the show, the stakes were high this week for things to get back on track.

News

Te Waha Nui
04/19/2016
Theatre community baffled by Maidment mystery

University staff and drama lovers are still waiting for the University of Auckland's Maidment Theatre to re-open after a sudden closure last year The doors of the University of Auckland's Maidment Theatre have been closed for months, and members of the local arts and culture community are starting to wonder if they will ever open again.

Te Waha Nui
04/03/2016
Finding shelter between the shelves

Events to benefit the city's homeless have been praised for engaging with the rough sleeping community The success of a book club for the homeless at Auckland's Central City Library has led to weekly Monday movie sessions attracting around 40 attendees every week.

Te Waha Nui
04/25/2016
High time for safe and affordable medical cannabis - protesters

Protesters gathered in central Auckland on Saturday to call for better access to cannabis for medicinal purposes Protesters called for access to safe and legal medicinal cannabis in New Zealand at the Medical Cannabis March held in central Auckland on Saturday afternoon.